So, you’re dating someone, and things feel amazing, then suddenly they begin to feel more like a stranger each passing day. Change is bound to happen throughout your relationship. However, how many of these changes are healthy, and how many others are due to a lack of consideration? There are things men do in the relationship that brings on some of these unwanted changes.
No matter how alike you think you are to someone, including your intimate partner, you will always see certain things from different perspectives. That is the beauty in relationships because you’re able to learn about things from different lenses, which is exciting. It can also be difficult to understand one another when it comes to certain things. Therefore, there will be behaviors that men may display that women will find quite irritating. While this feels like a generalization, a lot of men do these. Keep reading to discover the things men do that women can’t stand.
Selfishness In the Bedroom
If there is no stress, medical conditions, or other factors stopping you from pleasing her, then it’s selfishness. Being sexually intimate with someone who ignores your needs in the bedroom is frustrating. This is a sign of one-sidedness in the relationship, as there is no reciprocity. While she’s attentive to your desires, you seem to care less what she gets out of it. If you demand favors in the bedroom and are unwilling to return them, she will experience sexual dissatisfaction.
Some men may display this behavior at the beginning of the relationship, while others completely stop trying once you’ve been together for some time. If you’re a woman in this situation, you need to communicate this to him. However, if you have and your partner still only cares about his satisfaction, then you may not be sexually compatible after all. Sex may not be everything your relationship needs, but an unfulfilling sex life can pose additional challenges.
A Man Who Does Not Plan Vacations, Dates, or Anything That Requires Effort….
This is one of the things guys do that girls hate. While planning outings shouldn’t be the sole responsibility of the man, it shouldn’t completely skip his mind either. Some men don’t plan anything with their women in mind. This communicates to the woman that you don’t value her and are unwilling to make efforts that will contribute to her happiness.
Sometimes, men don’t plan because they’re scared their partner won’t like it. Other times, they’ve just gotten way too comfortable with seeing their partner too often. Regardless of the reasons, women appreciate men who go out of their way to plan something. It shows that you’re putting effort into the relationship, you’re listening to what she wants, and you care. Plans don’t have to be necessarily extravagant for your partner to feel loved. A simple gesture, such as an evening stroll in your city can be all a girl needs sometimes. Talk to your partner, see what she enjoys, and plan more.
Apologizing Without Knowing Why
Don’t just throw “sorry” out there every time your partner brings up a concern, just so she can stop talking about it. Men who do this often have no idea what they’re apologizing for; therefore, resolving nothing. If you ask them why they’re sorry, they can’t provide an explanation.
An apology without comprehension is not genuine. It simply shows that you’re unwilling to communicate. The same issue will repeat and since you did not take the time to understand your partner’s perspective prior to apologizing in the past, you will forever repeat the same cycle.
Walking Ahead of Your Woman
This one is quite baffling to a lot of women. There is a difference between walking ahead to open the door and walking in front of your woman every time you’re together. How are you able to walk uniformly while with your friends, but walk steps ahead of your partner?
Is this your way of showing your control over her? Are you ashamed of her? There are so many questions that women have when men display this behavior. It is not a good feeling to have to constantly run to keep up. It is quite hurtful and insensitive to your partner. When you’re together, it is so you could both create moments together. To a woman, simply walking by her shows that you value the time you’re spending together, and she feels more protected.
Treating Your Partner Like an Afterthought
She’s placed on the side until you need something from her. You probably may not realize you’re doing this, but she feels this way and has voiced it on multiple occasions, and you probably dismissed it as nagging. While you feel like you’re always with her, you’re not spending time together. You’re both just in the same place. While you may be playing video games, too busy on the phone, or too tired to hang out afterward, she’s vying for your attention.
Sometimes, other platonic relationships may feel more exciting than your intimate relationship, but this is because of what you put into each. You may feel like you have nothing else to talk to your partner about, but it is because you’re unwilling to create new memories. Ditching your partner for your friends or anything else that is not an emergency is inconsiderate. When she voices that she would like to spend more time together and you still repeat the same thing, she begins to feel unwanted.
Getting Upset When Women Ask for Reassurance
Normally, at the beginning of a relationship, compliments are never-ending. She wouldn’t need to ask if you like her new haircut, because you were extremely attentive and complimented her as soon as you noticed the change. However, your attention to her may have dwindled as your relationship progressed. When you stop doing these things, it can bring doubts in the relationship. Sometimes, women need to hear that you still love them and that you’re still attracted to them.
Seeking reassurance isn’t bad nor is it always good. While excessive reassurance can stem from a source of insecurity, seeking reassurance can also be innocent. If she seems to be looking for compliments, pay attention to her more. Don’t simply call her insecure for her wanting to know that she still looks good in your eyes. Even women who love themselves deeply still want to be told they’re loved.
Not Being Open to Constructive Criticisms
Concerns are not complaints; therefore, if that’s the only way you see it, you’ll never be open to listening. Constructive criticism is not an attack on your manhood. When a woman offers her feedback about something you’re doing or not doing in the relationship, it does not make you less of a man. It also doesn’t mean that she only focuses on the negative things you do. She simply wants the relationship to grow; therefore, brings up concerns she thinks can be fixed.
Positive criticism shows that she cares and wants the relationship to function. If you dismiss her completely each time she approaches you, she will fear talking to you about anything, which can lead to a lack of honesty and authenticity in the relationship.
Putting A Cross on Her Love Language (s)
You probably don’t speak the same love languages, which is okay. These differences aren’t the end of your relationship. However, completely disregarding your partner’s love language can complicate things. There are a lot of reasons you may not engage in her love language, whether you don’t see the value in it, or it leads to some form of trigger. Your reasons may be valid and should be respected, but without communicating this to her, she wouldn’t know how to work through it with you.
Acknowledge how she feels and communicate why you’re unwilling to speak her love language. This builds empathy in the relationship and can be something you can work on together or something she can be understanding of.
Not Keeping Promises
If there is something you’re not willing to do, don’t make a promise. This is one of the ways to break trust in the relationship. It is easier to make a promise than to confront a situation you’re avoiding, but this is not the best decision.
Most people, not just women, take promises seriously. If you can’t keep true to yourself, then it speaks volumes about your integrity. Keeping promises reflects who you are. Instead of making promises to get out of a situation, talk through it. Afraid to say no, so you make a promise? establish healthy boundaries. There are different positive ways you can go about it.
Forgetting Important Dates
Life can get hectic, and it is easy to be absent-minded. However, there are ways around remembering important dates and special occasions, such as putting those dates on your calendar. It is an excuse the first few times, but when it takes on a pattern, it shows that you don’t care. While it may not mean much to you, it could mean a whole lot to her. Remembering and celebrating these moments together can rekindle the romance.
There are things that men do that women find irritating. These things negatively affect the relationship as well. To avoid preventable arguments, listen to her more and communicate when something is not clear.
You won’t wake up tomorrow and be perfect because you worked on all of these. However, you will be a better person in the relationship. The goal is to improve together and work on the things that can flourish the relationship.