Can you remember what your first relationship advice was? It may have been after experiencing a heartbreak or while going through a whirlwind romance. Nonetheless, you probably had a few words of advice from someone in your life, whether you welcomed these pieces of advice or not.
The first year of a relationship can be exciting and filled with memories and smiles. However, challenges can also be experienced. After the infatuation stage, many people are faced with the stage of realization. During this stage, couples may become aware of their differences, which can create doubts. Some may not be well-equipped to handle the realization stage after the honeymoon phase without the right relationship advice.
A relationship is a partnership in which you work together. You can learn to better manage the difficulties of the first year, mainly through communication and patience. To further help, consider these top relationship advice for first-year couples.
Ask Relationship Questions
An important aspect of healthy relationship building that some ignore is relationship questions. There may be reasons why some may shy away from asking questions. They may believe discovering some facts about their partner might create doubts or they may simply be too afraid to.
You may think you know someone while dating them. However, there may be a lot more you have yet to discover. Relationship questions strengthen many elements of relationships, some of which are trust and communication. In addition, asking questions prevents assumptions, which can create conflicts in the relationship.
The questions you ask your partner should not be accusatory. This is a way to learn about one another and eliminate unrealistic expectations. Form the questions in a positive manner and make sure to ask open-ended questions to leave room for discussion.
Examples of relationship advice questions to ask your first-year partner:
• What are your top goals and values? – A good question when figuring out whether your values align.
• What qualities do you look for in a serious relationship partner?
• What type of partner are you looking for? – He may love traveling together, while you may not. If this is not something neither of you are willing to compromise on, it is important to know early.
These relationship questions are helpful during the first year. The questions can be as simple or as deep as you want. While the questions can slightly differ as the years progress, checking in with your partner by asking questions is a healthy habit long-term.
Love will not solve all your relationship conflicts
You may have heard that love is the answer to all. Although it is key to successful relationships, there is so much more that needs to be considered. As you navigate the relationship with your partner, you will discover that love simply does not answer it all. As beautiful as love may be, it is not sufficient for a thriving relationship.
Love is fleeting, as you can experience changes in your feelings. Sometimes, putting your feelings aside and thinking logically can help your relationship. You can deepen your intimacy so much more if you broaden your perspective.
“I love you. What more do you want from me?” Ouch, don’t be this person. You should not view love as the solution to all your relationship problems. It prevents you from reciprocating efforts and looking for other healthy problem-solving alternatives.
Explore each other’s love languages
One of the best relationship advice you will probably come across is this one. Relationships are not easy but understanding your partner’s love languages can be extremely helpful. To demonstrate care and appreciation for your partner, it is important to learn their love languages.
Love languages are a special form of communication used between partners. Exploring these during the first year of your relationship is important as it eliminates miscommunication. Additionally, it helps you understand your partner’s emotional needs, which can intensify your connection.
Have you ever had something done for you without asking? You most likely felt heard and appreciated. It is a similar experience when you show your affection by being aware of your partner’s love language. Taking the time to learn their love language shows that you care about them, and they will likely reciprocate the effort.
Be truthful, but mindful of your words
You should value honesty early in your relationship. While you should be transparent and truthful with your partner, think about your approach. Your comfort with your partner should not deprive them of the empathy you accord to others. Moreover, it should be a reason to be more thoughtful when approaching them with concerns.
Criticisms, blatant disregard, judgment, and hurtful words in the name of honesty are unnecessary. It prevents your partner from being open to the information you’re conveying and will likely result in a disagreement. After all, your partner has feelings, so it is necessary to always consider them prior to speaking.
Ask yourself whether it is necessary before voicing it. One of the important points of being truthful is that it communicates respect to your partner. With the wrong choice of words, you become disrespectful while trying to be honest. A few things to keep in mind when being honest with your partner are the information, your choice of words, and your tone of voice.
Make your boundaries known to one another
An extremely important relationship advice for couples to keep close is communicating boundaries. You may learn about your partner’s boundaries as the relationship progress, but it won’t hurt to be familiar with them earlier. Establish your boundaries and make them clear to your partner to avoid hurt along the way.
Personal boundaries are essential to healthy relationship dynamics. It helps establish respect in the relationship and helps your partner understand you further. In addition, you can detect red flags early in a relationship by distinguishing the difference between healthy and unhealthy boundaries.
Boundaries can change as you spend more time with your partner. This should not prevent you from talking about them in the first year. Instead, it should encourage you to approach your partner whenever you feel your boundaries have been crossed.
Stay authentic to yourself
Your relationship can impact your habits and behaviors. However, you should not welcome every form of change. The changes you make should not be unhealthy nor should they threaten your authenticity. Your partner will be understanding if they’re the one for you.
Some people show a different side of who they are to please their partner. Consequently, this creates unrealistic expectations in relationships. Your partner may expect things from you that you may be uncomfortable with based on how you portrayed yourself.
Have inner conversations with yourself and understand your purpose. This will prevent you from becoming someone you do not recognize. Changing yourself to find love or to fit a certain image is unsustainable. It denies you true happiness in your relationship. Moreover, it prevents you from experiencing a deeper connection with your partner.
Give as much as you are expecting
This rings true whether you’re looking for relationship advice for men or women. Making effort is not gender-specific in a relationship. You should not feel like you’re sacrificing excessively or not doing enough in the relationship.
The relationship may demand a few healthy compromises, but it only works efficiently when there is a balance. If one partner feels as though they’re the one always making changes to sustain the relationship, it may build resentment. To prevent this, understand your partner’s priorities and communicate.
Ignoring this piece of relationship advice can lead to an imbalance. First, it may make your partner feel as if you are not as committed. Second, it may deter them from trying in the future. Lastly, it might impact intimacy negatively. In sum, expecting more than you give is detrimental to your relationship. It is important to encourage communication when you feel your partner is not present in your relationship.
View your relationship as a loving partnership
Relationships are often referred to as partnerships for a reason. It is important to keep that in mind throughout the relationship. You are working together and not against each other. Developing this mindset helps you maintain patience and stability in your relationship.
As partners, you cultivate a deeper meaning behind your love. You are supportive of one another and dedicate time to each other. Sometimes, you may not always reach a resolution that benefits everyone, but you figure it out as partners.
Is this someone you want to be with long-term? A partnership welcomes healthy relationship decisions. It also allows you to not only view things from your own perspective, but also from your partner’s. Looking at your relationship as a partnership helps you maintain trust, honesty, and healthy habits.
Get into the relationship for the right reasons
Your intent behind pursuing a relationship should be genuine. There are various wrong reasons why some may choose to enter a relationship. A few of these reasons are loneliness, finances, looks, fear of being alone, and physical intimacy.
Engaging in a relationship for the wrong purpose is not only hurtful to yourself, but the person you’re in a relationship with. In addition, being in a relationship for the wrong reasons may cause a false sense of compatibility when you’re only experiencing chemistry, which is often superficial.
Sometimes, people don’t realize they’re not ready for a relationship. In this case, it is important to pay attention to your emotions, listen to yourself, and take time to heal. Relationships are not a solution to your life problems. Entering a relationship as a form of escape prevents you from experiencing self-love as well as love in your relationship.
Approach your new relationship differently from your last
This new relationship may not be your first, but you should approach it differently. Not everyone is the same; therefore, your experiences with your past partner will differ from your current. Comparing and treating your new relationship the same way as your last may lead to conflicts.
Choosing to bring the ghost of relationships past into your present relationship denies you the opportunity of forming a successful relationship. If you feel your inability to look at this relationship through a new lens is due to a lack of healing, be transparent with yourself and your current partner.
There are lessons to be taken from each interaction. You may have learned something from your past relationships that would be beneficial to your current relationship. However, give yourself the chance to know your new partner prior to applying those lessons. It may not be needed in your new relationship and can translate negatively to your partner.
○ The first year of your relationship can be filled with different emotions. You will experience relationship bliss but can also be faced with disagreements.
○ Online relationship advice or advice from family/friends can be helpful when navigating through your relationship.
○ Making healthy changes in your relationship not only helps to guide you through the first year but also subsequent years.
○ The first year can prove to be difficult, but thriving relationships have some fundamental elements. Some of these principles are highlighted within the relationship advice given.